Saturday, December 26, 2009

stream of consciousness poem after being back in the valley


i was that girl in the broken dress with the rhinestone tears skidding down my cheeks and cutting into my flesh
i was searching for you riding naked on the hood of your car
your wild voice and the fur cape the dancing stuffed animals and the way the trees dipped their blue green salt branches leaves into your mouth but i was at the other end of the valley too far away to find you

i was always thirsty and wine burned my throat cheap from my friend’s mother’s cellar so we could ride out into the darker parts of the valley and get fucked up and dance all night and the tire stores the car lots the neon the lonely lonely but we didn’t ride far enough i wanted you

we must find the ocean i thought running scared over the parking lot where the girl was killed by the drunk driver why does it keep getting harder why does the tumor grow in my father and when the oleander blooms the poison is in my throat but i won’t smoke cigarettes and won’t drive drunk only with drunk boys at the wheel and i won’t try lsd and i wont jump out the window and i am going to keep believing that across the expanse of this almost-killed valley lies something unbroken

perhaps a beautiful, scarred, naked boy with blue-green eyes and soft, dark hair riding on the hood of his car with a stuffed giraffe dancing in his hand and music playing in citrus colors

now it is two decades later and i am your tiger lily sober in a whole dress and the most beautiful thing i have ever seen is your fingers that quick on the keyboard of my soul and the eyelids of your eyes poised in concentration and your lips thinking and time and space have finally collapsed bringing us together and now you are here

Sunday, December 20, 2009


You are my eucalyptus medicinal and strong
Revealing layers of rose and jade and vein blue
And I will be your white birch
My bark thinning satin beneath the sweet scratch of your branch
Our roots entwine beneath the mossy earth
Our branches twirl with vines
Flowers cup for our dew

You are my warrior prince
I am your captured fae
Rescue me from the dungeon
on our good giraffe
and I will rescue you from sorrow
we will eat pancakes at midnight
and each other at dawn

Let me shapeshift and gender bend
Let me become everything you have ever desired
Let me be the nymphs dancing by the pool in our sodden cobwebs
Let me be the deer woman with shining haunches
Let me be the river that burbles warm over your pains and caresses each crevice of who you are
Let me be the pink lily that probes you with my stamen tongue
I weep with you for the lost worlds
I laugh with you until I shake
For our transformation
and the benediction of your coming

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Global Warming In the Time of Love

Nicholas Stern was speaking about this on NPR this weekend.

Let us build a city

Let us build a city by the banks of the river
Let us plant eucalyptus jacaranda and willow
A grove of miniature birches
White as fairy lights
And shaped like deer
Let us invite the deer! And the birds and the butterflies and fish to play in our glade
Let us build huts of willow bark and strew the floors with sand
Let us cloak this world in glamour of our love so that the hostile shall not see
How we move in lushness and sleep on moss and devour each other in a fall of leaves

The water rushes past slashed with moonlight
Your face pale with the cold your beautiful feet
I kneel before you and take you hard in my mouth
Stars fall into the wet like fish
The blossoms uncurl in purples
Solid your bones and your gasp falls into me

How do i know we can build a world?
For I had made my bed love
With twigs and roses sacred lilies
With tears and dreams and poems
And then you traveled over the barren concrete shores
Of the lonely baleful creek
And came to me

Friday, December 11, 2009


I was the one the shape-shifter trying to keep him whomever he was at the time
By becoming different forms
But you you change like light like dawn noon dusk night
You are the show stopper in your top hat and tails spinning rabbits out of hats
You are the rock god tossing long locks bones like steel
You are the green elf with leaf-shaped ears and crystalline hallways in your eyes
You are the faerie queen with lilac blossom hair and tender tongue
You are the bright boychild tossed asleep across my bed eyelids tinted dreaming
You are the wise hermaphrodite crone with your rough whiskers and soft hands
You are the plush tiger with broad nuzzling nose and solid paws
with whom I curl to sleep
You are the rose-petalled pies and cakes I kiss
You are the lewd pink flowers unfolding and shaking me with russet stain of pollen
You are everything and everyone I have ever wanted
All in the body of one man

Forgive me if I lost your lips
For that brief innocent indiscretion
For that moment I had thought to change
into the capricious fey you might desire
Forgetting that I did not need to change at all to shine for you
Just as you need not
ever change

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Dr. Hari Bhajan Khalsa's Magic Vegan Gluten Free Pumpkin Pie

photo by Ashley Luna Moon

2 C. Hazelnut Milk
3 C. Peeled, Steamed Pumpkins or Sweet Potatoes
1/2 C. Agave
1/4 tsp. cloves
1 tbsp. Cinnamon
1 1/2 tbsp Ginger
1/2 tsp. Salt
5 tsp. Arrow Root Powder

Scald milk. Set aside.
Puree pumpkins in blender or ffood processor
Mix in remaining ingredients except milk and arrow root
Add arrow root to lukewarm milk and beat lightly.
Add this to the pumpkin mix and blend well.
Pour into unbaked pie shells.
Bake at 450 for 10 minutes.
Reduce heat to 350.
Bake for 4--50 minutes.
The filling will darken as it cools.
Cool completely before cutting.


1 C. Almond Flour
1 C Coconunt Flour
1/2 Almond oil
1/4 c Agave
Combine all ingredients, adding a little more flour if needed to maintain a non sticky consistency. Press into pie pans.
Fill with pumpkins!

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Online Writing Class

My online writing class is finally ready to go!

Cemetery Girl by Daryl Darko Barnett

Daryl Darko Barnett's wonderful Cemetery Girl series: Wintre