Wednesday, October 5, 2011

torn red dress

You’re dead and the bruise on my fingernail still hasn’t grown out
The one I got when the weight crushed it
In the gym where you used to stand with tour hands in your pockets
Hiding the scars on your legs
Muscles diminishing but we didn’t really notice
Or how lonely you were
Or that there were tumors inside of you

I was being fucked the morning you died
By someone twice as tall
And even younger than you
And I’m ashamed I was cold
Because you rejected me for a twenty year old
When it would never have worked between us anyway
Now you are fading like the bruise on my thumb
While the man who called me baby doesn’t respond
And love, that trickster
Sits in the rain
Laughing in her torn red dress


  1. raw truth, brave one, & love.

  2. "A young swain falls in love with a princess, and the whole content of his life consists in this love, and yet the situation is such that it is impossible for it to be realized, impossible for it to be translated from ideality into reality. ... Love for that princess became for him the expression for an eternal love, assumed a religious character, was transfigured into a love for the Eternal Being, which did to be sure deny him the fulfillment of his love, yet reconciled him again by the eternal consciousness of its validity in the form of eternity, which no reality can take from him. ... He keeps this love young, and along with him it increases in years and in beauty. ... but then occurs the prodigy, he makes still another movement more wonderful than all, for he says, "I believe nevertheless that I shall get her, in virtue, that is, of the absurd, in virtue of the fact that with God all things are possible." ...At the moment when the knight made the act of resignation, he was convinced, humanly speaking, of the impossibility. This was the result reached by the understanding, and he had sufficient energy to think it. On the other hand, in an infinite sense it was possible, namely, by renouncing it; but this sort of possessing is at the same time a relinquishing, and yet there is no absurdity in this for the understanding, for the understanding continued to be in the right in affirming that in the world of the finite where it holds sway this was and remained an impossibility. This is quite as clear to the knight of faith, so the only thing that can save him is the absurd, and this he grasps by faith. So he recognizes the impossibility, and that very instant he believes the absurd..." --- Soren Kierkegaard, Fear and Trembling